Well, I tried todays build hibernate-core-4.1.11-20130308.132030-4.jar of 8 March, double checked that your fix is in. The scenario as I described in my previous message doesn't work. No index is inserted.

mgr.save(child)

generateUpdateRowString is never called neither is the AbstractCollectionPersister that is supposed to call it.

parent.getChildren().add(parent);
mgr.save(parent);

also doesn't create an index. generateUpdateRowString isn't called either. So I don't know at this point.
This message is automatically generated by JIRA.
If you think it was sent incorrectly, please contact your JIRA administrators
For more information on JIRA, see: http://www.atlassian.com/software/jira