Have you tried configuring the jrebel eclipse plugin? http://www.zeroturnaround.com/jrebel/eclipse-jrebel-tutorial/
You might want to ask on the m2e mailing list as the subject's been discussed already (http://comments.gmane.org/gmane.comp.ide.eclipse.plugins.m2eclipse.user/6602). I don't have much experience with jrebel myself, but the community at large might help.