Study the server/default/conf/bindingservice.beans/META-INF/bindings-jboss-beans.xml file, that should answer your questions. That file contains all port numbers used by JBoss AS - you can change the numbers to what you want. You can also change the offsets to what you want for the various binding values.
BTW, note that some of the ports are set via XSL transforms (lok at the very end of the file), which is why your original attempt to set server.xml didn't work - it broke the transforms.